Stupid Bird

The saga continues with Mr. Harold Headbanger.  His daily, unrelenting attack of his would-be nemesis begins anew…just when I thought I had outsmarted him with a fake red cardinal staked in the ground by the window he seems to love head-butting the best.

This fake cardinal did not "slay the dragon."

This fake cardinal did not “slay the dragon.”

I found the fake bird while at Home Depot the other day.  We were there confirming the details of our purchase for a replacement front door for our home.  Imagine having to replace the front door on a home that is just four years old?!  It’s a lovely wood door which has warped enough to make it impossible to fix.   It irks me to no end!

But I digress….

On our way out of the store we passed the garden area.  It’s beginning to fill up with items which suggests Spring is near.  That’s a hard concept to grasp because it’s currently 22 degrees outside.  Anyhow, that’s when I saw the cardinal lawn ornament.

Hmm.  The wheels are spinning inside my head…..

My dear friend “Cookie” brilliantly suggested affixing something to the window (like a pin wheel or whirligig of some sort) to scare off Harold.  I had been looking for something along those lines and had so far come up empty.   Perhaps a shiny red fake cardinal would do the trick…and it was only $3.97.  Perfect…especially after throwing down a boatload of money for a damn front door!

Once home I immediately staked it in the ground.  I noted that even a little breeze made the fake cardinal move–swaying back and forth, and side to side.  Even better,  I reasoned….it looks more like the real thing.  This should work! 

I didn’t hear Harold head-butting the windows for two days. Pure bliss, let me tell you!  I knew he was in the area because I could hear him singing (also blissful).  I called my sis and essentially told her that I’d “slayed the dragon.”  “I think I found a solution to keep Harold from head-butting the window!” I excitedly told her.

Folks, I’ll admit I was feeling mighty pleased with myself–and less agitated too since the poodle was not spending the better part of the morning barking.

That is…until this morning.

Harold’s back at it.  Stupid bird.  He’s been attacking the window since 8 a.m., flying right past the fake cardinal whose shiny wings are gently flapping in the wind.

At this point I cannot imagine why any self-respecting female would want Harold.

Don’t be fooled by his pretty song, I think to myself as I’m out in the yard with the poodle watching Mr. Harold Headbanger flit from tree to tree.   Harold is not getting the message …ergo…he is not too bright!

The search continues for something to affix to the window.

2 thoughts on “Stupid Bird

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